No Ups But Only Downs

Happy birthday and sorry i messed up your day. I know what i said to you really hurts but i was also not of any better. What you said to me was also hurting and awful. I don blame you cause i know both of us was very angry at that particular time. But i really mind when u talked to me in that way. Only being with you will make me feel like i'm the worst person on earth. I thought being in a relationship suppose to be happy but that's not what i feel at all. I really wanted to give up this relationship yesterday. It took me lots of courage to say the two words. But when you started asking me if that is what i really wanted, i couldn't answer. I was worried that i may regret one day. But if i have already chosen what i think is right, i won't take a u-turn. Just the same like you. You mentioned that everytime when you tell me that u're sad, i will just started saying i cannot take it. Do you know how hurt is that?? I really cared for you and that's what i get. I'm really too soft-hearted. I cannot repeat those words twice. Barely nothing can happen if it's just one sides fault. I know i have the responsibility too. Ended up i promised you that i will not ever say the 2 words again. Somehow, i know the same old incident will happen again. You told me to forget everything you said that hurts me, but i can't... really can't.

I always wanted things to go in my way.. but it never happens and it will never will. Am i too silly to think this way??